Fw: 7 Lies In Under 2 Minutes--Maybe A New Record!......

Subject: Fw: 7 Lies In Under 2 Minutes--Maybe A New Record!......

It's Barack Hussein Obama our Commander In Chief!

http://www.theospark.net/2009/09/video-7-lies-in-under-2-minutes.html


Fw: 7%




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----- %







A Holy man was having a conversation with the Lord one day and said, 'Lord, I would like to know what Heaven and Hell are like.'








The Lord led the holy man to two doors.






He opened one of the doors and the holy man looked in.






In the middle of the room was a large round table..







In the middle of the table was a large pot of stew,







which smelled delicious and made the holy man's mouth water.







The people sitting around the table were thin and sickly.







They appeared to be famished. They were holding spoons with very long handles that were strapped to their arms and each found it possible to reach into the pot of stew and take a spoonful.







But because the handle was longer than their arms, they could not get the spoons back into their mouths.







The holy man shuddered at the sight of their misery and suffering.






The Lord said, 'You have seen Hell. They went to the next room and opened the door. It was exactly the same as the first one.






There was the large round table with the large pot of stew which made the holy man's mouth water.







The people were equipped with the same long-handled spoons, but here the people were well nourished and plump, laughing and talking.







The holy man said, 'I don't understand.







'It is simple,' said the Lord. 'It requires but one skill.







You see, they have learned to feed each other.







The greedy think only of themselves.'







When Jesus died on the cross, he was thinking of you.







Its estimated 93% won't forward this.







If you are one of the 7% who will, forward this with the title '7%' .







I'm in the 7%





Remember that




I will always share my spoon with you.

Fwd: A great quote

Subject: Fwd: A great quote

What a great quote...we should be all fired up !!!

Bud

"As an American I am not so shocked that Obama was given the Nobel Peace Prize without any accomplishments to his name, but that America gave him the White House based on the same credentials." - - Newt Gingrich

Fw: Uh ... uh, er, ahhhhh, er


"We have room for but one flag, the American flag... We have room for but one language here, and that is the English language... and we have room for but one sole loyalty and that is a loyalty to the American people." Theodore Roosevelt
=

Fw: Re: Fw: Did you get yours?



Fw: Fw: Fwd: Neighbor VS. Neighbor ~ too funny about guns

Just one of the consequences of gun control. I have heard many others say those who support gun control had better think of ALL the consequences...especially with the drug problem all over the country. Most who want the second admendment protected feel the way the homeowner below feels.. i.e. "You voted for gun control, you live with it. Law enforcement cannot and will not camp outside your house to protect you. You are on your own."




Fw: Unsavory Language...

UNSAVORY NASTY BARNYARD LANGUAGE

Years ago I sometimes used unsavory language, I often used the expression "Bull S***." As I grew up and discovered it was not necessary to use such crude language, that expression became "BS."

Q. What did I really mean when I used that expression?

A. I meant that something was ridiculous, or idiotic or a half truth or just plain stupid. It covered any number of negative formats. The dictionary defines it as: nonsense; especially: foolish insolent talk....

I have decided that I no longer will use either of those expressions in the future. When I have a need to express such feelings, I will use the word "Pelosi."

Let me use it in a sentence. "That's just a bunch of Pelosi!"

I encourage you to do the same. It is such a nasty word. It really packs a lot of punch. We are no longer being vulgar, but it clearly expresses our feelings.

If enough of us use it, perhaps the word could be entered into the dictionary.....

When on a ranch watch your step and don't step in Pelosi...It will get on the bottom of your boot and won't go away until next election!! (What a descriptive legacy for the Speaker of the House...)

PASS IT ON TO AT LEAST 10,000,000 PEOPLE. DO NOT BREAK THIS CHAIN OR YOU WILL GET MORE PELOSI THAN YOU CAN SHAKE A BULL AT.... :-)

Fw: Free Obama Cell Phone for welfare recipients

----- Original Message -----
Sent: Sunday, October 25, 2009 10:26 PM
Subject: Free Obama Cell Phone for welfare recipients

A friend sent this to me earlier today.


I had a former employee call me earlier today inquiring about a job, and at the end of the conversation she gave me her phone number. I asked the former employee if this was a new cell phone number and she told me yes this was her €Å“Obama phone. I asked her what an €Å“Obama phone was and she went on to say that welfare recipients are now eligible to receive (1) a FREE new phone and (2) approx 70 minutes of FREE minutes every month. I was a little skeptical so I Googled it and low and behold she was telling the truth. TAX PAYER MONEY IS BEING REDISTRIBUTED TO WELFARE RECIPIENTS FOR FREE CELL PHONES. This program was started earlier this year. Enough is enough, the ship is sinking and it€™s sinking fast. The very foundations that this country was built on are being shaken. The age old concepts of God, family, and hard work have flown out the window and are being replaced with €Å“Hope and Change € and €Å“Change we can believe in. You can click on the link below to read more about the Obama phones just have a barf bag ready.


Wonder what other vote buying schemes are out there that most folks don't know about.


This is the site to register for a phone.

https://www.safelinkwireless.com/EnrollmentPublic/Home.aspx
Or just google "free phones for welfare recipients."

Fw: List of Achievements



Fw: Obama...

Oh, I love these. They need to be bumper stickers!

Q: What's the main problem with Barack Obama jokes?

A: His followers don't think they're funny and everyone else doesn't think they're jokes.

Q: Why does Barack Obama oppose the Second Amendment?

A: It stands between him and the First.

Q: What's the difference between Rahm Emanuel and a carp?

A: One is a scum sucking bottom feeder and the other is a fish.

Q: What's the difference between Greta Van Susteren and Barack Obama?

A: Greta only talks out of one side of her mouth.

Q: What does Barack Obama call lunch with a convicted felon?

A: A fund raiser.

Q: What's the difference between Obama's cabinet and a penitentiary?

A: One's full of tax evaders, blackmailers and threats to society. The other is for prisoners.

Q: What's the difference between a large pizza and the typical Obama backer?

A: The pizza can feed a family of four.

Q: What's the difference between Simba and Obama?

A: Simba is an African lion while Obama is a lyin' African.

Q: If Pelosi and Obama were in a boat and it started to sink, who would be saved?

A: America !!

Q: What do you call the US after four years of Obama and the Liberal congress?

A: An Obama-nation.

Q: What's the difference between Obama and Hitler?

A: Hitler wrote his own book.

Q: What's another difference between Obama and Hitler?

A: Hitler got the Olympics to come to his country.

Q: Why doesn't Obama pray?

A: It's impossible to read the teleprompter with your eyes closed.

- Barack Obama: He has what it takes, to take what you've got!

- Barack Obama's campaign slogan, "Yes we can" has become, "Yes you will!"

- No one wants to see GM's new convertible, the Pelosi, with its top down!

- The liberals have asked us to give Obama time. 25 to life seems appropriate.

- Obama doesn't want terrorists tortured. He wants to torture American taxpayers instead.

New Barack Channel (NBC)

Another Barack Channel (ABC)

My Seriously New Barack Channel (MSNBC)

A woman applying for a job in a Florida lemon grove seemed to be far too qualified for the job.

The foreman frowned and said, "I have to ask you this; "Have you had any actual experience in picking lemons?"

"Well, as a matter of fact, I have!" she replied. "I've been divorced three times, owned 2 Plymouths, and I voted for Obama."

Fw: Kentucky man found dead

The Lexington, Kentucky Police Department reports finding a man's body in the Kentucky River just west of the Clays Ferry Bridge. The dead man's name will not be released until his family has been notified.

The victim apparently drowned due to excessive beer consumption. He was wearing black fishnet stockings, a red garter belt, a pink g-string, a strap-on dildo, purple lipstick, and an Obama t-shirt. He also had a cucumber in his rectum.

The police removed the Obama t-shirt to spare his family any unnecessary embarrassment.

Fw: I'd Bet The Next Governor Of Georgia Knows The Answer To This Question....

more pelosi baloni........


Subj: Fwd: I'd Bet The Next Governor Of Georgia Knows The Answer To This Question....

.....and appreciates that the question, as well as the answer, is as serious as it gets....
Even if as many as 534 craven trollops and compromised lap dogs in Congress don't know the answer to that question, Governor McBerry will be standing in the breach with us right beside him - with the answer - to repel the invasion of tyranny.
Our friends, neighbors, and family need to know that - and they need to know that NO OTHER CANDIDATE COMES CLOSE WHEN IT COMES TO DEFENDING THEIR LIFE & LIBERTY AGAINST AN OUT OF CONTROL FEDERAL GOVERNMENT WHICH IS NOW READY TO SURRENDER TO AN INTERNATIONAL VERSION OF TYRANNY THAT MUST BE THE LITERAL INCARNATION OF HELL ON EARTH.
Spread the word, speak to one new contact a day, invite them to www.georgiafirst.org , challenge them to become committed to saving their republic for their children and grandchildren.
As Ray has said: Wringing hands and signing online petitions isn't going to get it done anymore.
Not only that, but going along with whatever version of lifelong bureaucrat bought-and-paid-for interchangeable establishment shill the "R" version of surrender on the installment plan throws in front of the electorate - is a guaranteed one way ticket to serfdom. We don't need worn out slogans and imposters paying lip service to states' rights out of one side of their mouth - and the simultaneous cowardice of compromise and negotiation for just how much of our sovereignty we will be surrendering out of the other.
If not us, who? If not now, when?


It's time to get on our knees and pray, then get off our knees and fight! - William Grigg

John Blank
Cherokee County Coordinator
Governor McBerry 2010
The Family That Moves Like An Army



Fw: Is She the Piñata?

----- Original Message -----
Sent: Thursday, October 22, 2009 5:17 PM
Subject: Is She the Piñata?

Subject: Is She the Piñata?

I've looked at this over and over and still can't believe it! How DID those people on either side of them keep a straight face???






Fwd: FW: AN INTERESTING FACT

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From:
Date: Tue, Oct 20, 2009 at 4:54 PM
Subject: FW: AN INTERESTING FACT
To:








From:
Sent: Tuesday, October 20, 2009 2:05 PM
To:
Subject: FW: AN INTERESTING FACT







Subject: Fwd: AN INTERESTING FACT




An interesting letter in the Australian Shooter Magazine this week, which is quoted as follows:

"If you consider that there has been an average of 160,000 troops in the Iraq theater of operations during the past 22 months, and a total of 2112 deaths, that gives a firearm death rate of 60 per 100,000 soldiers.

"The firearm death rate in Washington , DC is 80.6 per 100,000 for the same period.

That means you are about 25 percent more likely to be shot and killed in the U.S. capital, which has some of the strictest gun control laws in the U.S., than you are in Iraq."

Conclusion: The U.S. should pull out of Washington .

Fw: N ew lingo



Fw: The Problem

Subject: Fw: The Problem

Fw: Note to Obama from Bush

Sent: Friday, October 16, 2009 9:25:08 AM
Subject: Fw: Note to Obama from Bush










This is priceless!

As you might know after 6 months in office as President it is customary for the last president to send a note
of congratulations to the new one.

Yesterday Obama received the customary note from President Bush.

However, when he opened the note he was sure it must be in some secret code that he was
unaware of it since it read: 370H-SSV-0773H

This really troubled Obama as he had always thought, as well as his beloved followers, just how dumb the former
President Bush was perceived to have been.. He first took the note to his beautiful (?)
wife. She was unable to decipher it.

He then called his VP and he was of course unable to decode the message. He then called the
Chief of Staff and the head of the Secret Service and all were unable
to determine the meaning of the note. He even checkedwith the Speaker of the
House who just blinked and smiled.

There was complete panic in the oval office. A special emergency meeting was called by the staff.
All branches of the military,Counter Intelligence, CIA, FBI were called in and the best
minds were unable to crack the code. Finallyafter a sleepless night,
a now humbled man, Obama picked up the phone and called the former
President and asked him the meaning of the note.

President Bush just chuckled and said to Obama. . "Partner. . .. You are holding the note upside down."

Fw: Fwd: A One Question Poll

----- Original Message -----
To:
Sent: Sunday, October 18, 2009 7:01 AM
Subject: Fw: Fwd: A One Question Poll






I doubt this is a truly scientific poll, but see how your opinion stands in this poll.
It's very interesting.
-------Original Message-------
A One Question Poll

A one question poll: No email to submit, no address, no name ....


This is your chance to vote on Obama's performance on this Economy-AT&T/Yahoo Poll...


NOTE: this is a totally unbiased poll. The question is stated very simply... and, to the point. No tricks. No hidden messages. No nothing. JUST A SINGLE, SIMPLE QUESTION. There is no way that anyone can say that it was not a fair poll; or, that it was "phrased" in a way that it can be interpreted later; to fit someone else's desired answer. In other words; it is a spin-doctor's nightmare.



NOTE: After you vote, you will see a second page that shows the running total and what the opinions are.

Then pass it on... so others can cast their vote....

Fw: guns

Subject: guns

Clint Smith, Director of Thunder Ranch, is part Drill Instructor, And part stand up comic. Here are a few of his observations on Tactics, firearms, self defense and life as we know it in the Civilized world.

"The handgun would not be my choice of weapon if I knew I was going to a fight....I'd choose a rifle, a shotgun, an RPG or an atomic Bomb instead."

"The two most important rules in a gunfight are: Always cheat and Always win."

"Every time I teach a class, I discover I don't know something."

"Don't forget, incoming fire has the right of way."

"Make your attacker advance through a wall of bullets. I may get killed with my own gun, but he's gonna have to beat me to death with it, cause it's going to be empty."

"If you're not shootin', you should be loadin'. If you're not loadin, you should be movin', if you're not movin', someone's gonna Cut your head off and put it on a stick."

"When you reload in low light encounters, don't put your flashlight in your back pocket... If you light yourself up, you'll look like an angel or the tooth fairy...and you're gonna be one of 'em pretty soon."

"Do something. It may be wrong, but do something."

"Nothing adds a little class to a sniper course like a babe in a Ghilliesuit."

"Shoot what's available, as long as it's available, until something else becomes available."

"If you carry a gun, people will call you paranoid. That's ridiculous. If I have a gun, what in the hell do I have to be paranoid for."

"Don't shoot fast, shoot good."

"You can say 'stop' or 'alto' or use any other word you think will work but I've found that a large bore muzzle pointed at someone's head is pretty much the universal language."

"You have the rest of your life to solve your problems. How long you live depends on how well you do it."

"You cannot save the planet. You may be able to save yourself and your family."

"Thunder Ranch will be here as long as you'll have us or until someone makes us go away and either way it will be exciting."

More Excellent Gun Wisdom.......The purpose of fighting is to Win!

There is no possible victory in defense. The sword is more important than the shield, and skill is more important than either.

The final weapon is the brain. All else is supplemental.

1. Don't pick a fight with an old man. If he is too old to fight, He'll just kill you.

2. If you find yourself in a fair fight, your tactics suck.

3 I carry a gun cause a cop is too heavy.

4. When seconds count, the cops are just minutes away.

5. A reporter did a human-interest piece on the Texas Rangers. The reporter recognized the Colt Model 1911 the Ranger was carrying and asked him 'Why do you carry a 45?' The Ranger responded, 'Because they don't make a 46.'

6. An armed man will kill an unarmed man with monotonous regularity.

7. The old sheriff was attending an awards dinner when a lady commented on his wearing his sidearm. 'Sheriff, I see you have your pistol. Are you expecting trouble?' 'No ma'am.. If I were expecting trouble, I would have brought my rifle.'

8. Beware the man who only has one gun. He probably knows how to use it!

'The true Soldier fights not because he hates what is in front of him, but because He loves what is behind him.' -G. K. Chesterton

A people that values its privileges above its principles will soon lose both.

'Those who hammer their guns into plows will plow for those who do not.' ~ Thomas Jefferson

"A general dissolution of principles and manners will more surely overthrow the liberties of America than the whole force of the common enemy." --Samuel Adams

If you believe in the 2nd Amendment, please forward. I just did.

Fwd: Breaking News


BREAKING NEWS: This just in!!! Obama wins the Heisman Trophy after watching a college football game!!!

Fw: FW: fertilized egg business

this is just terrible, so politically incorrect.


John was in the fertilized egg business.
He had several hundred young layers (hens), called 'pullets,'
and ten roosters to fertilize the eggs.

He kept records, and any rooster not performing
went into the soup pot and was replaced.

This took a lot of time, so he bought some tiny bells
and attached them to his roosters.

Each bell had a different tone, so he could tell from a distance,
which rooster was performing.

Now, he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report
by just listening to the bells.

John's favourite rooster, Hussein, was a very fine specimen,
but this morning he noticed Hussein's bell hadn't rung at all!

When he went to investigate, he saw the other roosters were busy chasing
pullets, bells-a-ringing, but the pullets, hearing the roosters
coming, could run for
cover.

To John's amazement, Hussein had his bell in his beak, so it couldn't
ring.

He'd sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one.
John was so proud of Hussein, he entered him in the Renfrew County Fair
and he became an overnight sensation among the judges.

The result was the judges not only awarded Hussein the No Bell Piece
Prize but they also awarded him the Pulletsurprise as well.
Clearly Hussein was a politician in the making.

Who else but a politician could figure out how to win two of the

most highly coveted awards on our planet by being the best at

sneaking up on the populace and screwing them when they weren't

paying attention.

Vote carefully, the bells are not always audible.


Fw: Welfare Momma

Date: Saturday, October 17, 2009, 11:26 PM




A woman walks into the downtown welfare office, trailed by 15 kids.

'WOW!' the social worker exclaims. 'Are they all yours?''

'Yep, they are all mine,' the flustered momma sighs, having heard that question a thousand times before.

She says, 'Sit down Leroy.' All the children rush to find seats.


'Well,' says the social worker, 'then you must be here to sign up. I'll need all your children's names.'


'Well, to keep it simple, the boys are all named 'Leroy' and the girls are all named 'Leighroy'.'

In disbelief, the case worker asked, "Are you serious? They're ALL named Leroy?"

Their momma replied, "Well, yes -- it makes it easier. When it's time
to get them out of bed and ready for school, I yell, 'Leroy!' And when it's time for dinner, I just yell 'Leroy!' an' they all comes a running'. And 'if I need to stop the kid who's running into the street, I just yell Leroy' and all of them stop. It's the smartest idea I ever had, naming' them all Leroy."


The social worker thinks this over for a bit, then wrinkles her forehead and says tentatively, "But what if you just want ONE kid to come, and not the whole bunch?"




"Then I call them by their last names.."

 
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