FW: Funny

----- Original Message -----


--- Funny

Katie Couric, Charlie Gibson, Brian Williams and a tough old U.S. Marine
Sergeant were captured by terrorists in Iraq.
The leader of the terrorists told them he'd grant each of them one last
request before they were beheaded and dragged naked through the streets.

Katie Couric said, 'Well, I'm a Southerner, so I'd like one last plate of
fried chicken.'

The leader nodded to an underling who left and returned with the chicken.
Couric ate it all and said, 'Now I can die content..'

Charlie Gibson said, 'I'm living in ' New York, so I'd like to hear the
song, The Moon and Me, one last time.'

The terrorist leader nodded to another terrorist who had studied the Western
world and knew the music. He returned with some rag-tag musicians and played
the song.

Gibson was satisfied.

Brian Williams said, 'I'm a reporter to the end. I want to take out my tape
recorder and describe the scene here and what's about to happen.
Maybe, someday, someone will hear it and know that I was on the job till the
end.'

The leader directed an aide to hand over the tape recorder and Williams
dictated his comments.

He then said, 'Now I can die happy.'

The leader turned and said, 'And now, Mr. U.S. Marine, what is your final
wish?

'Kick me in the ass,' said the Marine.

'What?' asked the leader, 'Will you mock us in your last hour?'

'No, I'm NOT kidding. I want you to kick me in the ass,' insisted the
Marine.

So the leader shoved him into the yard and kicked him in the ass.

The Marine went sprawling, but rolled to his knees, pulled a 9 mm pistol
from inside his cammies and shot the leader dead.
In the resulting confusion, he emptied his sidearm on six terrorists, then
with his knife he slashed the throat of one, and with an AK-47, which he
took, sprayed the rest of the terrorists killing another 11.

In a flash, all of them were either dead or fleeing for their lives.

As the Marine was untying Couric, Gibson, and Williams, they asked him, 'Why
didn't you just shoot them all in the first place? Why did you ask him to
kick you in the ass?'

'What?' replied the Marine, 'and have you three assholes report that I was
the aggressor......?


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07:37:00

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

It's astonishing that with awesome marines like that, we're still enmired in this stupid war seven years later.

ferschitz said...

No love lost on Couric, Gibson & Williams, none of whom approach being a "good" reporter in my book. However, I note that the traditional & typical RWF victimization is in full force here. The right hates them some horrid mean old Katie who lobbed out all of those incredibly hard "Gotcha" questions at the Snowbilly Grifter, like: what newspapers do you read?? Geez, that's a question that none of the 22% could answer; only elite LIEbruls could answer that while sipping lattes at evil Starbucks.

And then, ohmigawd, Charles Gibson had the bald-faced temerity to ask a VPOTUS candidate what she thought of the Bush doctrine. I mean, seriously folks, whyever would we want a VPOTUS to have knowledge of trifling piffle like that, when she can (not really) shoot moose from a helicopter??

Not sure what evil sin Brian Williams purpetrated on Caribou Barbie... maybe her asked her where she went to college or something.

So: my bet is that this written by a precious Sistah Pallin worshipper.

How dare you ask my savior a real political question??? You, you, you eeevul librul, you!!

almoderate said...

I get the right wing part of it, but...

Where's the funny? They were kind of on a roll for a while there. That one wasn't even funny.

Marc with a C said...

"The Marine went sprawling, but rolled to his knees, pulled a 9 mm pistol from inside his cammies and shot the leader dead. In the resulting confusion, he emptied his sidearm on six terrorists, then
with his knife he slashed the throat of one, and with an AK-47, which he took, sprayed the rest of the terrorists killing another 11."

Someone's been playing a little too much Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2

Celia said...

I expect the terrorists would have known to strip the Marine down to get his weapons off him. Though it's nice to assume in one's macho fantasies that the enemy is as dense as cement, and the sort of people who would forget that members of the military are usually given weapons as a general rule. But a good Marine ought to, I'm sure, be prepared for the event of their capturers knowing stuff about stuff.

Anonymous said...

I "get" the fantasy "joke" here, insofar as rightwing fantasies go, and this one's all about how liberal the media is, except of course for lone sole "voice" of ever so fair and ever so balanced Fake Noise. And of course, this one incorporates the ever-popular victimization of the right by the p.c. liberals, yadda yadda.

These folks need to give it a rest.

 
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