Fwd: A Letter From a Granddad

Guess you heard that 68% of the youth vote went to Obama. My granddaughter called this morning to tell me she was one of them. I replied with this e-mail:

Dear Susan,
The election of Obama comes down to this. Your grandmother and I, your mother, and other productive, wage-earning tax payers will have their taxes increased and
our savings greatly diminished due to the new administrations economic policiesthat means less income left over. Less income means we will have to cut back on basic purchases, gifts and handouts.
That includes firing the Hispanic lady who cleans our house twice a month. She just lost her job. We can't afford her anymore.
What is the economic effect of Obama's election on you personally? Over the years, your grandmother and I have given you thousands of dollars in food, housing, cash, clothing, gifts, etc. By your vote, you have chosen another family over ours for help. So in the future, if you need assistance with your rent, money for gas, tires for your car, someone to bring you lunch, etc. ... call 202-456-1111 . That's the telephone number for the Office of the President of the United States . I'm sure Mr. Obama will be happy to send a check from his personal or business accounts, as we have, or leave cash in an envelope taped to his front door for you, as we have.
It's like this. Those who vote for the President of the United States should consider what the impact of an election will be on the nation as a whole and not just be concerned with what they can get for themselves (welfare, stimulus checks, etc.). What Obama voters don't seem to realize is that the government's money comes from taxes collected from tax paying families. Raising taxes on productive people means they will have less money to spend on their families.
Congratulations on your choice. For future reference, you might attempt to add up all you've received from us, your mom, Mike's parents and others and compare it to what you expect to get over the next four years from Mr. Obama.
To congratulate Mr. Obama and to make sure you're on the list for handouts, write to:

The White House
1600 Pennsylvania Ave. NW
Washington, DC 20500

Love you Susan, but call the number listed above when you need help.



SJT said...

Wow... grandpa makes over 250K a year, and a 4% marginal increase in his taxes is enough to make him fire his maid and disown his granddaughter? Nice guy.

Of course, there's the possibility that Grandpa probably doesn't make that much, which means he's probably going to be cashing his brand new Obama tax rebate plus his one time social security stimulus bonus very soon. Maybe he can use that money to buy his granddaughter a nice dinner to apologize for being such a bastard.

Anonymous said...

Aww, don't be so hard on grandpa. They just upped the price of manhattans down at the all-white country club again, and withholding tips from the waitresses is proving inadequate for communicating his frustration with the socialist Hussein X!

Anonymous said...

How sad that grandpa is a liar and stupid. May I suggest that he cancel cable instead of firing his employee?

Anonymous said...

My very ancient parents both got a LOT nicer, a LOT more tolerent, and a HUGE amount more sensible once Alzheimer's and dementia came knocking on their doors. I am not very sad about their declining mental capacity (well, a little bit) b/c they both STOPPED listening the right wing media, esp. el-Lushbo Rimjob.

Believe me when I say, they REVERTED BACK to being the reasonably sane, kind and compassionate parents that I remember from my distant youth. It is very interesting, but once they were UNPLUGGED from the brainwashing of the right-wing media, they "came to their senses," even as their mental capacities declined.

Perhaps Susan's grandfather will develop dementia soon (it would truly be a "good thing"), and Susan can return to enjoying her grandfather as a nice guy.

I am honestly telling a true story here. NO snark whatsover.

Anonymous said...

Thanks, Grandpa. Even though you are a nasty, cheap, lying, miserable bastard, I will continue to exhibit my compassion for you when get old and need help. Because ya see, grandpa, MONEY is not the only thing that matters, even though you and your rich racist countryclub friends seem to think so.

Anonymous said...

Aww, sounds like y'all are a little afraid the money might get shut off if times get hard. Lashing out at the money that supports you is so cliched.

All you spoiled little weenies are getting mean spitited and exhibiting ageism in your comments.
What would your oh so sensitive peers and more importantly, common senseless professors, think of you if they read these?

Anonymous said...


Calling an idiot an idiot is not subject to an age limit.

Anonymous said...

This reminds me of a comedian I once saw who said his birthday gift from his grandmother was a check. No card. The straight man said "That's great, no guilt-ridden card." "Yes, but look at the memo field..." "Ouch. 'Fuck you'"

Translation: your grandfather is an asshole.

Even though Obama has no said he will have some modest tax increases on high earners, I can't get over all these idiots who claim that they have "fired people" or "cancelled purchases" or whatever on the chance that some of these might happen. Its no wonder our economy is in the crapper; apparently, a great number of Americans have no understanding of marginal taxes or the normal political process.

Anonymous said...

"Wow Grandad I didn't know your sense of love and family was contingent on agreeing political views. You're such a patriot!"
Didn't Bush send out a stimulus check last year? Did Grandad hate that to hell too or is it because it's a Democrat sending it?
Has anyone else noticed that the FIRST thing everyone says about Obama's tax plan is how it'll hurt YOU. Me smells fear monkeying in the air thair.
Boy I hope some of this bailout/stimulus starts to work soon...

Anonymous said...

Sadly, all too often these days I find that a "sense of love and family" IS contingent on agreeing political views.

In my family, I have had to draw firm boundaries on absolutley NO political discussion whatsoever. It will only lead to disaster.

I don't care that my entire family is made up of fundamentalist, racist, nutcases. I grant them rights to their "beliefs."

But they are utterly INTOLERANT of the slightest deviance from their rigid, self-serving, self-absorbed point of view. They only "tolerate" me b/c I help out a lot w/my aging parents.

I'm sure it gauls them that I am doing so well in my own life b/c I vote Democratic. It does not compute for them.

I think once my parents are gone, my relationship w/ the rest of the family with be over, but it will be because they cannot tolerate my point of view. Sad, that.

Marc with a C said...

I love the fact that the e-mail warns that one should think about the potential damage to the whole country when deciding which candidate to vote for, and then proceeds to catalogue how much money Mr. Pewterschmidtt is no longer going to be able to spend on his $50 a day Latina maid or on his grandkids.

Hey man, I hope Galt's Gultch is wheelchair accessible.

Marc with a C said...

So instead of voting for the candidate who will give us the most, we should vote for the candidate who will do the most for the "country?"

And you reinforce this point by cutting off your grandkids?

Bonus: Mr. Pewterschmidt here can no longer afford to pay $50 a day twice monthly to have Mrs. Guttierez come vacuum the house. Man, I hope there's no entrance fee at Galt's Gulch.

Anonymous said...

Wow, who knew Granddad was such a prick!

So, Susan, I would suggest putting some construction adhesive in the old dickhead's Poligrip.

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