Fw: Dear Abby

----- Original Message -----
Subject: Fwd: Dear Abby
 

 
 



Dear Abby ,

My husband has a long record of money problems.

He runs up huge credit-card bills and at the end of the month, if I try to pay them off, he shouts at me, saying I am stealing his money. He says pay the minimum and let our kids worry about the rest, but already we can hardly keep up with the interest.

Also he has been so arrogant and abusive toward our neighbors that most of them no longer speak to us.  The few that do are an odd bunch, to whom he has been giving a lot of expensive gifts, running up our bills even more.

Also, he has gotten religious. One week he hangs out with Catholics and the next with people who say the Pope is the Anti-Christ, and the next he's with Muslims.

Finally, the last straw. He's demanding that before anyone can be in the same room with him, they must sign a loyalty oath.

It's just so horribly creepy!
 
Can you help?


Signed, Lost in DC
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Dear Lost:

Stop whining, Michelle. You can divorce the jerk any time you want. You're getting to live in the White House for free, travel the world, and have others pay for everything for you. The rest of us are stuck with the bastard for two more years!


Abby

7 comments:

Valeyard said...

Wow, just wow.
1. Which "bills" are these, exactly? The unsustainable spending of every recent Republican President, the bailouts engineered by Bush, or the stimulus so you don't die in a gutter?

2. When did Obama call the Pope the Anti-Christ? Oh, never? Huh.

3. Republicans are the ones who kick you out of the party for not voting in lock-step.

4. Why would you blame Fake Michelle for wanting to stop the bad practices of Fake Obama?

5. When are Republicans going to remember that the Obamas are already rich?

Anonymous said...

Was this recycled from when W was president? Because the huge deficit spending, antagonism to neighbors, two faced nature and loyalty oaths are all things I vividly remember from his Presidency.

gruaud said...

What would you idiots be saying, if it was McCain who was trying to dig out from under Bush the Lesser's economic shitstorm? (As if he'd even try -- but let's just say he would for the sake of argument)

It would STILL be Obama's fault; eh? Of course it would. I mean, hell! He used Grey Poupon mustard, for Christ's sake!

Wonder why we never take you seriously?

That's the tiniest part of it.

ferschitz said...

What? Loyalty oath? Sheesh, yeah, this seems to be describing the reign of W. I do often feel that Barack is *also* carrying forward what Bush enacted (much to my personal displeasure), but this one ends up in the usual cloud-cukoo land of dumbfack stupidity.

If you want to talk about Obama continue the Bush/Cheney program of rendition & torture: fine. I "down" with that, and let's talk about it. Or how there's almost double the amount of US military dying in the wars that Bush LIED to start - but the increase in deaths has occurred under Obama. Wanna *discuss* that?? I'm here for you: let's talk.

Oh, I see: typical Tea Bagger, you'd rather *waste* your time and energy frothing at the mouth at some dumbfackery ginned up by zillionaire David Koch's thinktank... which Koch does in order to *distract* you conservatives from the *reality* of what's going on.

Like shooting fish in a barrel.

Anonymous said...

This REALLY sounds like a recycled W joke.

Anonymous said...

Yup!

Here's the original, still available out ther on the interwebs!

DEAR ABBY,

My husband has a long record of money problems. He runs up huge credit card bills and at the end of the month, if I try to pay them off, he shouts at me, saying I am stealing his money. He says pay the minimum and let our kids worry about the rest, but already we can hardly keep up with the interest.

Also he has been so arrogant and abusive toward our neighbors that most of them no longer speak to us. The few that do are an odd bunch, to whom he has been giving a lot of expensive gifts, running up our bills even more. Also, he has gotten religious in a big way, although I don't quite understand it. One week he hangs out with Catholics and the next with people who say the Pope is the Anti-Christ. And now he has been going to the gym an awful lot and is into wearing uniforms and cowboy outfits, and I hate to think what that means. Finally, the last straw. He's demanding that before anyone can be in the same room with him, they must sign a loyalty oath. It's just so horribly creepy!

Can you help?

Signed, Lost in DC

Dear Lost:

Stop whining, Laura. You can divorce the jerk any time you want. The rest of us are stuck with the asshole for four more years!

Hooray4US said...

Thanks last Anon!! This is very typical, as rightwingers really have no sense of humor. Most of their "jokes" are either pathetic, or they're repeats of W jokes... which aren't nearly as apt in terms of Obama, no matter how much conservatives furiously wish to believe.

 
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