Fw: Today's life

An ingenious example of speech and politics occurred recently in the United Nations Assembly which made the world community smile. A representative from Israel began: "Before beginning my talk I want to tell you something about Moses. When he struck the rock and it brought forth water, he thought, 'What a good opportunity to have a bath!' He removed his clothes, put them aside on the rock and entered the water. When he got out and wanted to dress, his clothes had vanished. A Palestinian had stolen them."

The Palestinian representative jumped up furiously and shouted, "What are you talking about? The Palestinians weren't there then."

The Israeli representative smiled and said, "And now that we have made that clear, I will begin my speech."


Kevin said...

Moses never reached Israel. You would think that a Jew might know that; it's clear that the Christian author of this jape didn't. That's not surprising, given that RW Christian knowledge of Judaism begins and ends with "Israel has to be supported so that it can be destroyed in Armageddon."

Anonymous said...

Woah. So I guess native americans should go ahead and start bombing whites, blacks, mexicans, asians, etc, since they were here first.

Anonymous said...

Did the Israeli representative have a Plan B in case a Palestinian did not jump up to interject just the right thing?

"...When he got out and wanted to dress, his clothes had vanished. A Palestinian had stolen them. (A pause. Silence.) Thank you. Now I will begin my speech."

Anonymous said...

Wow. I've never seen so much ignorance and straw man talking points crammed into such a short story.

My two cents should be that, if ancestral ownership entitles you to current occupation, the Israel ambassador should take a good look at his skin tone versus the Palestinian's, and try to figure out who's ancestors *actually* spent the last 5000 years in the Middle East.

Anonymous said...

I'm not sure why everyone thinks this is such a complicated issue, when it's perfectly clear to World Net Daily readers. The site had a recently poll that asked "Should the U.S. oppose Israeli communities on the West Bank?"

The number one answer, with 43% of the vote, was "No, God gave it to the Israelites, and that settles it."

I mean, who can argue with "God did it, so there"? Maybe if the Israel ambassador had just explained to the Palestinian that it's their land because God said so, I'm sure that would diffuse everything.

Anonymous said...

Crap, the second anonymous stole my comment idea.
Maybe he would've followed up with, "... ok, a Jew, a dirty filthy Palastinian, and a dirty filthy Muslim walk into a bar... anyone? Really? No one wants to take the bait so a clever RW email can be made from it? I hate you all."
"Now I'll begin my speech."

Anonymous said...

I myself want these damned Romans out of my country. And as for the Vikings, don't get me started!

(I'm sure this event totally happened, just like the story says, and isn't made up in any way at all. And even if it did, as the first Anonymous up there says, that leaves things wide open for the native Americans. But I suppose that's different because, you see, they're brown and FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF)

Anonymous said...

I would happily bet any amount of money and give 10 to 1 odds to the writer of this nonsense if he/she could prove it.

Marc with a C said...


Especially considering that in 1947, a Palestinian farmer went off to pick some olives, and when he came back, a Jew had stolen his country.

Also ironic, given that the very word Palestine is a corruption of the word Phillistine the (you guessed it!) original inhabitants of the area before the Hebrew God instructed his chosen people to go seize some prime real estate on the far side of the Sinai.

Anonymous said...

The sad thing is that those who think this "joke" is a laff riot are mainly only interested in Israel for their own selfish "needs" re the alleged Apocalypse... which is pretty weird all around. They just can't wait to get Raptured outta here, but as many have said before me: I got dibs on their stuff when they're finally GONE.

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