Constipated?
If you are bothered by occasional or frequent constipation, look in the mirror and repeat the following phrase three times in succession when symptoms occur:
"My financial and personal well being are totally in the hands of Barack Obama, Joe Biden, Harry Reid, Nancy Pelosi, Tim Geithner, Rahm Emmanuel, Barney Frank, Chris Dodd, Maxine Waters and Al Gore"
If that doesn't scare the shit out of you, then you are probably destined to be backed up for the rest of your life.
There is no need to thank me for this advice; I'm just doing a public service.
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6 comments:
You know what's scary?
http://www.secularhumanism.org/index.php?section=library&page=haught_29_5
Booga booga booga
I think MRWD has had this one before. Or a similar one.
Didn't make me shit myself then, either.
IMO the best medical advice always relies on methods learned from urban legends and/or ghost stories.
An effective cure for hiccups is to go out with a boyfriend/girlfriend, park your care in a remote location, wait for a creepy noise and then send your romantic partner out to investigate.
Most cancers can be cured by eating fried sewer alligator tail.
This health update has been brought to you by the "Get Out and Push" obstructionist party.
What the shit does Al Gore have to do with anything? Your financial well-being is only in his hands if you're betting horses with him for some reason. Also, Maxine Waters seems like kind of a random name to throw out, unless this was being sent to people who were automatically terrified of blacks and women and...
OH.
RIGHT.
Actually, there's something quite factual in this one. I think they hit the nail on the head!!!!
Repugtards ARE constipated probably MOST of the time, and that probably explains why they all have $hit for brains!
Gee, thanks, RWF: that does make sense (too bad it doesn't make them any more tolerable to deal with).
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