MyRightWingDad.net

>>
>>It was getting a little crowded in Heaven, so God decided to change
>>the admittance policy. The new law was that in order to get into
>>Heaven, you had to have a really bad day on the day that you died. The

>>policy would go into effect at noon the next day.
>>
>>So, the next day at 12:01 the first person came to the gates of
Heaven.
>>The Angel at the gate, remembering the new policy, promptly asked the
>>man, "Before I let you in, I need you to tell me how your day was
>>going when you died."
>>
>>"No problem," the man said. "I came home to my 25th-floor apartment on

>>my lunch hour and caught my wife having an affair.
>>But her lover was nowhere in sight.. I immediately began searching for

>>him. My wife was half naked and yelling at me as I searched the entire

>>apartment.
>>
>>Just as I was about to give up, I happened to glance out onto the
>>balcony and noticed that there was a man hanging off the edge by his
fingertips!
>>The nerve of that guy! Well, I ran out onto the balcony and stomped
>>on his fingers until he fell to the ground. But wouldn't you know it,
>>he landed in some trees and bushes that broke his fall and he didn't
die.
>>This ticked me off even more.
>>
>>In a rage, I went back inside to get the first heavy thing I could get

>>my hands on to throw at him. Oddly enough, the first thing I thought
>>of was the refrigerator. I unplugged it, pushed it out onto the
>>balcony, and tipped it over the side. It plummeted 25 stories and
crushed him!
>>
>>The excitement of the moment was so great that I had a heart attack
>>and died almost instantly." The Angel sat back and thought a moment.
>>Technically, the guy did have a bad day. It was a crime of passion.
>>So, the Angel announced, "OK, sir.. Welcome to the Kingdom of Heaven,"

>>and let him in .
>>
>>A few seconds later the next guy came up. To the Angel's surprise, it
>>was Donald Trump. "Mr. Trump, before I can let you in, I need to hear
>>about what your day was like when you died." Trump said, "No problem.

>>But you're not going to believe this. I was on the balcony of my 26th
>>floor apartment doing my daily exercises. I had been under a lot of
>>pressure so I was really pushing hard to relieve my stress. I guess I
>>got a little carried away, slipped, and accidentally fell over the
side!
>>
>>Luckily, I was able to catch myself by the fingertips on the balcony
>>below mine. But all of a sudden this crazy man comes running out of
>>his apartment, starts cussing, and stomps on my fingers. Well, of
>>course I fell. I hit some trees and bushes at the bottom, which broke
>>my fall, so I didn't die right away.
>>
>>As I'm laying there face up on the ground, unable to move and in
>>excruciating pain, I see this guy push his refrigerator of all things
>>off the balcony. It falls the 25 floors and lands on top of me,
killing me.
>>
>>The Angel is quietly laughing to himself as Trump finishes his story.
>>"I could get used to this new policy," he thinks to himself. "Very
well,"
>>the Angel announces. "Welcome to the Kingdom of Heaven," and he lets
>>Trump enter.
>>
>>A few seconds later, Bill Clinton comes up to the gate. The Angel is
>>almost too shocked to speak. Thoughts of assassination and war pour
>>through the Angel's head. Finally he says, "Mr. President, please tell

>>me what it was like the day you died."
>>
>>Clinton says, "OK, picture this. I'm naked, inside a
refrigerator......"