MyRightWingDad.net: Fw: IMPORTANT NEWS FLASH!

Fw: IMPORTANT NEWS FLASH!

Subject: Fw: IMPORTANT NEWS FLASH!

Naval assistance ...

The United States Navy intercepted three boatloads of people off the coast of Miami today. This placed the Navy in an awkward position, as the boats were not heading to, but away from Miami towards Cuba. Another surprise finding was that they were loaded with Americans who were all seniors of pension age. Their claim was that they were trying to get to the Cuba so as to be able to return to the US as illegal immigrants, and therefore be entitled to far more benefits than they were receiving as legitimate US pensioners. The Navy, it is believed, gave them food, water, and fuel and assisted them on their journey.

We are booking the next boat out. Let me know if you want to come.

11 comments:

Anonymous said...: Anyone who really believes this should give it a try. Seeing what life is like outside of their picket fence might teach them a thing or two.; 14 May, 2012 08:14
Anonymous said...: They actually believe this crap, and then they'll still go ahead and vote in GOP officials who are explicitly anti-Social Security and anti-Medicare. The GOP has literally voted for the destruction of these senior benefits through the Ryan plan. But who cares about that, when there's undeserving illegals who are (not) benefiting from public services?; 14 May, 2012 08:58
CharlieE said...: But who cares about that, when there's undeserving illegals who are (not) benefiting from public services?

It's not just the illegals that Republicans are worried about. They don't believe that anyone receiving government benefits of any kind at all is deserving of them.

They believe that America consists of two kinds of people:

1. Those who pay taxes while receiving absolutely nothing in return, and

2. People who do no work, pay no taxes, and sit awash in government handouts.

To the Republican eye, you're either one who only gives, or one who only takes. There is nothing else.; 14 May, 2012 09:33
Thx 4 Fish said...: pensioners?; 14 May, 2012 11:29
ferschitz said...: To Thx 4 Fish:

Yeah: what, exactly, is this "pensioner" that is discussed in this RWF? Pensions mostly don't exist anymore, and with the way conservatives want to cut Soc Sec and Medicare - in order to ensure that some dastardly dirty LAZY mofo illegal doesn't, you know, get "something for nothing" - US citizens will soon have nothing even remotely resembling a "pension."

Rightwingers are constantly yelling at us that 401(k) plans are the bomb... even though most citizens lots TONS of their own money in their 401(k) plans in the crash of 2008 (and then got the pleasure of bailing out the 1% bc they were "too big to fail"). Most of us have not yet made back the money we lost, esp because of extremely low to non-existent interest rates on safer investments, such as CDs and savings accounts.

Schools, if they exist, will have to provide special instruction to students on an extinct system, called pensions, that has not existed for quite some time.

P.S. If this is a "joke," it's very lame. Conservatives would be better served to watch Michael Moore's documentary, Sicko to witness how US citizens actually went to Cuba to obtain free and far better and more reliable health care than what is available to them in the USA.

Ooops, I forgot: conservatives don't wish to live in reality. Much better to live in some fairy tale world where pensions still exist, and we can blame all of our problems on phantom illegals who are ripping us off somehow.; 14 May, 2012 13:27
Anonymous said...: In my experience "pensioner" is British slang for a senior citizen,. and it is (or was, pre austerity) a fairly apt term.

Kind of odd to have a British term referring to someone who's basically relient on the state in a RWF, but then logic and consistency have never been big factors in these emails.; 14 May, 2012 15:02
gruaud said...: Did I just read a right-wing forward that used the word 'entitled' in a non-derogatory manner?; 14 May, 2012 16:20
Hooray4US said...: Good catch, gruaud.

It seems that the "entitlement" is only due to the "pensioners," who are white senior citizens.; 14 May, 2012 18:07
Mr_Creosote said...: "...it is believed..."

Yeah really concrete evidence, that.

Major bullshit, even by right wing forward standards.

Alas, only a matter of a few days before I'll probably receive this from my own right wing dad.; 15 May, 2012 00:52
Marc with a C said...: Any chance we can get the Cuban air force to drop sand bags on them on their way back out?

Also, I hate to poke holes in something this retarded, but...

Aren't Cubans who make it to the U.S. give asylum automatically? In that case, they're not actually illegal immigrants.; 15 May, 2012 23:37
Anoner said...: Geez, Marc, stop with the reality already! Anyway, aren't most of the Cubans who end up in America Republican voters??

Ooops, I'm committing the cardinal sin of being factual, also, too.; 16 May, 2012 11:00