Subject: ISIS Soon To Be Non-Existent
ISIS Soon To Be Non-Existent
The Pentagon announced TODAY the formation of a new 500-man elite fighting unit called the United States Redneck Special Forces (USRSF).
These boys will be dropped off in Iraq, and have been given only the following facts about ISIS:
1. The season opened today.
2. There is no limit.
3. They taste just like chicken.
4. They don't like beer, bacon, BBQ, pickups, nude women, country music...or Jesus.
AND
5. They are directly responsible for the death of Dale Earnhardt.
The Pentagon expects the problem in IRAQ to be over by Friday.
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8 comments:
Riigghht!
I know plenty of jerkweeds like these sorts.
Redneck special forces: A formidable force indeed...
However:
1) Make very well sure any contact with the enemy doesn't interfere with a televised football or basketball game. For all their deficiency in critical thinking, they display an amazing amount of thought and analysis in sports. Alas, they lack such brain power ( like a small hard-drive ) that after normal body functions like breathing, pulmonary actions, blinking of the eyes and stuff, there's very little mind power left over for things that actually matter.
2) Insure an adequate supply of heavy greasy food washed down with lots of light beer
3) Related to the above point: Access to meds to counteract their own self abuse must me maintained in battlefield conditions afar.
4) Plenty of rest breaks with oxygen supplies after extended ( 5+ minutes ) exertion must be provided.
Sure, I'm using hyperbole to make a point, but really: how long would any of these yahoos survive even basic training in the military, let alone wartime conditions afield?
It turns out that right wingers ARE good at recycling after all...
Jeesh guys, get some new jokes.
o·ver·com·pen·sa·tion
(ō′vər-kŏm′pən-sā′shən)
noun.
Excessive compensation, especially the exertion of effort in excess of that needed to compensate for a physical or psychological characteristic or defect.
Boy howdy! That dude's dick must be non-existent.
New twist on on old joke:
How to get the Russians out of Afghanistan - Send three Cajuns in and tell them two is the limit and no hunting after dark.
Why don't these lily-livered chicken shit cowards just join the Military? Too real for them?
Six comments and nobody has mentioned the terrible Photoshop of this guy's head... it's not even centered between his shoulders!
Good catch Anon. Didn't bother to look that close myself. lol Wait a second...is that Chuck Norris?
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