Fw: Foxworthy on The Taliban

> ----- Original Message -----
> Subject: Foxworthy on The Taliban
>
>
>
> Some interesting observations on the Taliban by that great American
> philosopher, Jeff Foxworthy.
>
>
> "YOU MAY BE A TALIBAN IF..."
>
> 1. You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to
> liquor.
> 2. You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can't
> afford shoes.
> 3. You have more wives than teeth.
> 4. You wipe your butt with your bare hand, but consider bacon "unclean."
> 5. You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.
> 6. You can't think of anyone you haven't declared Jihad against.
> 7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in
> your clothing.
> 8. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than
> setting off roadside bombs.
> 9. You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least
> four.
> 10. You've always had a crush on your neighbor's goat.
> 11. Your cousin is president of the United States.
>
>
>
>

17 comments:

Anonymous said...

Now that's funny!!!!!

gruaud said...

Almost nine years later, 10-12,000 guys
with more wives then teeth have fought us
to a standstill.

Hilarious.

Anonymous said...

Wakka Wakka!

I'm sure that Jeff Foxworthy had little do to with the making of this list. Especially the last item.

ferschitz said...

Condescending, mostly inaccurate and not funny, imo.

Having lived in that part of the world, what passes for "humor" like this just reflects the abject ignorance & rudeness encouraged by tools for the rightwing.

No fan of the Taliban, myself, but they rose in power because the USA (and the CIA) armed them against the Soviet Union and then walked away after the USSR was defeated. We did nothing to "nation build," and so the Taliban assumed command in the vacuum. NOW Foxworthy wishes to mock and deride the Taliban?? Perhaps Foxworthy would do better to mock & deride the CIA.

Also one thing really stands out, which is the "ha ha" mocking comment about heroin production. In fact, ONE of the big things that the Taliban was against was the growing of opium poppies for heroin production, and the Taliban had been very effective in wiping that out. It's a known fact that as soon as we invaded Afghanistan 9 years ago, the CIA immediately paid the farmers to grow poppies and start heroin production again in order to fund the CIA's covert operations there (and elsewhere).

Most of the other things he says on his list are almost as equally stupid & ill-informed.

So yet again, we have LYING rightwing propoganda... this time brought to the slavering Pavlov's dogs by Jeff Foxworthy. I knew there was a reason why I didn't like this clown.

bendk said...

Heh heh! Just a good ol' boy tellin' it like it is! No partisan lines here! Dun care ho u r dis funny right here

Daft Greg said...

I guess he really is Fox-worthy.

Anonymous said...

Non-political comedians, like professional athletes just love to advertise their political views, that way they can cut their fan base in half forever--NOT

katz said...

I remember lists like these going around after 9/11, making this one nine years old. That's still in its infancy in the RWF world, though.

Anonymous said...

@ gruaud
I bet millions of Iraqis are glad their dictator and his henchmen are gone. Saddam killed more Iraqis than we may ever know and now they are gone and is that a bad thing? I just regret that we didn't completely finish the job the first time we were there?

Anonymous said...

Lighten up! It is a comical view of some nasty, deadly terrorists. Unless, you love your neighbor's goat, too.

Anonymous said...

@ Anon

Um... Gruaud was talking about the Taliban. In Afghanistan. The ones who actually had something to do with 9/11. He didn't mention Iraq or Saddam or Operation Iraqi Screwup. Are you still equating one with the other, even though they had nothing to do with each other?

Anonymous said...

@ Anon

Its a stupid list filled with ignorance and light on "comedy". And as Gruaud said, this group of supposedly goat loving idiots has fought our mighty nation to a standstill for almost a decade. Not much to laugh about.

gruaud said...

1) The Taliban are in Afghanistan, not Iraq. The Afghani War was nearly won before Bush the
Lesser, prompted by Cheney, diverted most
troops into Iraq. Now the Taliban controls
80% of Afghanistan AGAIN and the war, for
all intents and purposes, is lost. They can
hold us there indefinitely, sucking our blood
like a leech...because most of the army is
playing whack-a-mole in Iraq.

2) I bet many more millions of Iraqis are NOT
glad Saddam is gone, because at least there
was a modicum of stability in a country that
is now a slice of pure Hell. You are seeing the
result of "finishing the job the first time".
Seven years later and we're no closer to ending
than when we started. Daddy Bush was much
wiser than the idiot son.

Why don't we invade Canada? I bet millions of
Canadians will be glad that Stephen Harper
and his henchmen are gone. I know I would.

Sure, Saddam was a dick. So is Kim Jong Il.
I hear Putin's not very nice either. Too
bad, but the people in those countries are
going to have to find their own way, with our
tacit support. THAT'S how it works.

You can't justify sending thousands of
Americans to their deaths or to be horribly
maimed and spend trillions of dollars
essentially cratering our economy because
a bad guy is in charge of another nation.

That's why there's a thing called diplomacy.

Hooray4US said...

Thanks, gruaud; quite agree. And it's a "tell" that one of the rightie Anon posts got Iraq and Afghanistan confused. Quite indicative of the low-information that most citizens have - or care to have - about what our nation is actually doing.

We dare to question Jeff Foxworthy's ignorant stab at "joking" about the Taliban. A rightie then scolds us because of how "great" it was that Team USA killed Saddam Hussein and informs us about how "grateful" the Iraqi's are that Team USA did that.

Until citizens really engage themselves in what our nation is doing, I'm not particularly interested in their nitwitted, uninformed views created by rightwing brainwashers, such as Rush, Glenn, and RWF's like this ignorant piece of tripe.

There is a difference between Afghanistan and Iraq. There is a difference between the Taliban in Afghanistan and the Muslim communities (there are several) in Iraq. There is a difference between the War in Iraq and the War in Afghanistan.

The only things that are the SAME about both Wars/countries is that Team USA should have never gone to War in either place, and US citizens' tax dollars are being poured down the hell-hole of endless wars that will never be "won" by our side and have only served to make us more vulnerable to terrorist attacks. Of course, Bush and Cheney are laughing all the way to the bank because they're making out like bandits from War, Inc.

Wake up, you fools. You're being duped... and by Jeff Foxworthy no less. Sheesh.

Hooray4US said...

Thanks, gruaud; quite agree. And it's a "tell" that one of the rightie Anon posts got Iraq and Afghanistan confused. Quite indicative of the low-information that most citizens have - or care to have - about what our nation is actually doing.

We dare to question Jeff Foxworthy's ignorant stab at "joking" about the Taliban. A rightie then scolds us because of how "great" it was that Team USA killed Saddam Hussein and informs us about how "grateful" the Iraqi's are that Team USA did that.

Until citizens really engage themselves in what our nation is doing, I'm not particularly interested in their nitwitted, uninformed views created by rightwing brainwashers, such as Rush, Glenn, and RWF's like this ignorant piece of tripe.

There is a difference between Afghanistan and Iraq. There is a difference between the Taliban in Afghanistan and the Muslim communities (there are several) in Iraq. There is a difference between the War in Iraq and the War in Afghanistan.

The only things that are the SAME about both Wars/countries is that Team USA should have never gone to War in either place, and US citizens' tax dollars are being poured down the hell-hole of endless wars that will never be "won" by our side and have only served to make us more vulnerable to terrorist attacks. Of course, Bush and Cheney are laughing all the way to the bank because they're making out like bandits from War, Inc.

Wake up, you fools. You're being duped... and by Jeff Foxworthy no less. Sheesh.

Tootseye said...

Just by the way, and for a little reality check:

Afghanistan most likely had little to do with 9/11, abeit Osama bin Laden did flee to Afghanistan after that event. That's why Bush the dumber sent special ops forces there in October 2001 - to "take out" ObL. But when the Special Ops got close to capturing him, Bush via Donald Rumsfeld had them leave the Tora Bora Hills. Why? Perhaps the lengthy friendship between the Bush and bin Laden families had a little something to do with that decision.

The main country funding Al Qaeda was Saudi Arabia. Check it out. And guess who also has a big old long-time friendship with the bin Saud royal family? Why, surprise, surprise, the Bush family (there are photos readily available of W kissing bin Saud and holding his hand).

Yet Bush did nothing, nada, zip about the Saudi's and their involvement with and funding of al Qaeda. Instead, Bush LIED (it's been proven) to citizens and said that Saddam Hussein was behind 9/11 and funded & supported Al Qaeda (go look it up). In fact, Hussein had been very effective at keeping Al Qaeda OUT of Iraq and very firmly did not support them at all. And there were no Weapons of Mass destruction in Iraq; that was yet another lie that W told citizens.

Agree with a lot of prior posts, plus find it sad and unfortunate that so many citizens are quite ill-informed about what they, as taxpayers, are paying for in the Middle East. Agree with another prior post: Wake Up. Figure it out. You're paying for these endless wars, and you're not getting anything at all for it, except dead US military personnel and dead Iraqi's & Afghani's (most of whom are innocent).

I also find Foxworthy's "jokes" offensive. It's called propoganda.

katz said...

Also, is Taliban really a non-collective noun? Like can you actually be "a Taliban?" Because I thought it just referred to the organization; ergo an individual would be "a member of the Taliban," or something like that.

 
Creative Commons License
MyRightWingDad.net is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.